We Were an Accidental Boarding Family

We caught up with a Mum of a Year 8 boy and Year 7 girl at Millfield Prep to hear about her family’s first year of boarding. She shared two different settling in experiences for both of her children and her advice for other parents considering boarding at Millfield Prep. 

"We were an accidental boarding family. As a military family, we never intended our children to go to boarding school, but circumstances changed and suddenly we found ourselves with two children starting at Millfield Prep at the same time – our son in Year 8 in Berewall and our daughter in Year 7 in Hollies. 

It was a huge adjustment. Overnight, we went from a busy family home to an empty house, so it was a steep learning curve for all of us. 

When we started looking at schools, what drew us to Millfield Prep was the sporting provision, the large boarding community and, especially, the number of children who stay in school at weekends. Some of the schools we visited had very few boarders staying over the weekend, and we worried about what the downtime would look like. We wanted somewhere with a real sense of community and plenty going on. 

The other thing that really appealed to us was the approach to technology. We liked the fact that there was limited time on phones and lots of opportunities for the children to be outside, active and trying new things."

Two children, two completely different experiences 

"I have two very different children, and they had two very different boarding journeys. 

Our son disappeared into boarding life almost immediately. We didn't hear from him for over three weeks, and I eventually rang his Housemaster just to check he was still alive! He laughed and reassured me that he was absolutely fine and had thrown himself into boarding life.  

Our daughter was the opposite. After a couple of weeks with very little contact, she started calling home every day and was homesick. We spoke with her house parents, who were absolutely amazing – not just with our daughter, but with us as parents too. 

Together, we agreed a regular time for her calls, just before tuck, so she always had something to look forward to afterwards. As they realised she was struggling, they put extra support in place, both in school and in the boarding house. 

By the second term, she was beginning to settle. By the third term, we hardly heard from her because she was so busy enjoying boarding life. Looking back now, it's incredible how different her journey has been. The support we received, particularly from her house parents, was unreal."

Saying yes to new opportunities 

"Both of our children are sporty, but boarding has encouraged them to try things they would never have considered before. 

One Saturday evening, our son rang us at 9.30pm asking if he could play in a padel tournament the next day because someone had dropped out. 

We thought "Has he ever played padel before?"

He hadn't, but was given the opportunity to play and his team ended up coming third, he was absolutely delighted. 

Since joining Millfield Prep, he's also taken up rowing and squash – sports he'd never played before – and now he represents the school. One of the reasons we chose Millfield Prep was because it throws opportunities at the children, and that's exactly what we've seen."

Growing in confidence and independence 

"The biggest change we've noticed is how much more organised and independent they have become. 

They're much better at preparing themselves for everything they need, managing their own routines and taking responsibility for day-to-day life."

My advice to other parents 

"I'd give three pieces of advice. 

Firstly, if you can, go for the valet service. They label both school uniform and home clothes and, for me, it's been worth every penny. Another parent recommended it to me before we started, and it has saved me hours of sewing name labels into clothes. 

Secondly, allow yourself to be guided by the house parents. They have so much experience, and they really do know what they're doing. They supported us every step of the way. 

Finally, I'd say boarding is a bit like riding a rollercoaster with your eyes shut. Just when you think you've reached the end, there's another twist or another unexpected moment. Every child is different, and every boarding journey is different too. 

It has certainly been a steep learning curve for our family, but watching both of our children grow in confidence, independence and happiness has made it all worthwhile."

To hear more parent perspectives on boarding at Millfield Prep, listen to our latest podcast episode here.